Anti-Comedic Jokes

Anti-Comedic Jokes

• Your mother is so incredibly obese, she doesn't need a GPS; she has her own gravitational pull.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she steps on the scale, it says, "One at a time, please!"
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, her blood type is Ragu.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she wears a yellow raincoat, people yell, "Taxi!"
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, she doesn't get on the scale; she gets on the scale's waiting list.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, if she were to run, she'd be classified as a natural disaster.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, her favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch; she calls it lunch.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she goes to the beach, the tide goes out.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she skips breakfast, the stock market drops.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, she has her own area code.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she wears a bikini, the entire beach gets a no-swimming advisory.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, she has to hire a team of sherpas to help her get into her own car.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she sits around the house, she really sits AROUND the house.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she stands still, she looks like a double-decker bus.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, her favorite form of exercise is a power nap.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she walks through a door, she has to make reservations.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, she can't even fit into the joke!
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she went to the zoo, the elephants started taking notes.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she starts a diet, the whole food industry holds its breath.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, she makes an 18-wheeler look like a Smart car.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, she needs a lifeguard when she goes to the swimming pool.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she goes to McDonald's, they put her picture on the wall as a landmark.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, her favorite music genre is heavy metal—literally!
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she opens her fridge, it qualifies as a natural disaster.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, she has to use a special bus that accommodates her size.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, even her shadow has a shadow.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, she gets stuck in the doorway like a bottle neck.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she joins a gym, they give her a lifetime membership for free.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she dances, the floor has to be reinforced.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, the weather report says her belly creates low-pressure systems.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she takes a selfie, the camera asks for a panoramic mode.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she goes to outer space, NASA uses her for gravity experiments.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she gets on a roller coaster, it has to be closed for safety regulations.
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she plays hide and seek, good luck finding her—she takes up the whole room!
• Your mother is so incredibly obese, when she takes a picture, the camera breaks because it can't handle the flash flood of light.